Friday, December 11, 2009

forgive me?

last two days..i read this magazine..the 'remaja',it sorts of teenagers magazine..haha..usually i just bought this magazine not really often..i can count how many times i bought a year!!hee..perhaps once in 6 months??how bad am I!it's not like i am soo stingy or what..but i don't have heart to buy it sometimes..only if i'm in my mood to read all those magazines..if not,i just borrow from my sister or my's me..wee's main topic..i took a quiz from that magazine which it's all about forgiveness thingie..hurm..let see..the topic is..'Are you a person that easily forgive other people mistake??'
i took this quiz to see what is inside of me and what people might think about me and who am's like all the time if i made a mistake,i seek for forgiveness and what i hope is other people can forgive me easily..but how i think if other people made a mistake,can i easily forgive them??and i want to know if i'm easily forgive other people or,i tried this quiz..well,after i did the quiz..i found that:

I am easily forgive other people but hard to accept it
'forgive other people before i go bed is my routine,i don't like to make a conclusion of my day as horrible like yesterday..and i don't want to be feel like sophisticated about it..but what is the differences between me and others is i can easily forgive other people..maybe people might see that i don't want to talk with them after they did a mistake..but actually,frankly speaking..i forgive them already..i already forgive them after they did their mistake..hurm..hur just me..its my natural way..i really2 want to be friendly back after they did some mistake,what they have done..although it just a tiny single mistake..but i can't..don't ask me..and i already tried..sorry people??..i know it sounds like i am soo cruel maybe??but i told you..i forgive other people after they did their mistake but to accept and to face them back kinda take a short or longer time for me..i desired to talk with them again..especially if its happen with my own best friend,or or with my family!can u imagine that??it's totally the hardest principe is if i get hurt deeply once,totally like if its a serious matter,forever i will hard to believe them just enough for me to forgive them..but to accept them back is moderately hard for me..'

People might think that i am a bad person..sadistic..pathetic..but guys..i'm totally sorry..i try to change okayh..dats my promise..maybe i did all this because of my age??well u noe..teenager age...they oftenly like to 'memberontak'..and i'm not being matured..and maybe based on my experince mom always said..'let people do to us ika,but don't we ever do anyhthing that can hurt or harm others''s true..i noe and i did that before and maybe i'm not be like this 'pathetic' or 'uneasily accept other people'..i emphasised that sentences..hurm..if one of my friend in my high school did something that never appreciate what i did for her,she tried to be a backstabber..tried to think that she's the one that should be fully loved by other people especially teachers and friends (it's not like i'm soo jealous with her okay!! but u noe..well3..)..sharing is caring la huh!..don't control other people so that people can love you only,she make my close guy friend which i share every single problems with him and also known as my twn brother not treat me properly anymore and doesn't care about me at all..even i'm the one that introduce her to him..she tried to close with all friends that i close..i don't even know wether its just a coincident or purposely or whatever words that u can replace it just happen to me!!huu..and she tried to use other people for her own benefits..she told me before..people will never see her 'bad behaviour'..but i think i am so lucky to have an advantage that i can see her bad's totally horrible year for me..i'm always fall sick that year..and she doesn't care about me at all..i told just what i feel..and i still can't accept her in my life today..i gave her so many time to change and chances but she just take it for granted..what else i can say..i'm not a PERFECT girl to judge and fixed other people..

1 comment:

  1. babe, why are u saying u are sadistic and pathetic???????
    that is so not true!!!!